


Couples Counseling

by Violet_Rose



Category: Ghost Adventures (TV)
Genre: Fluff and Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2020-11-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 08:27:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,164
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27467953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Violet_Rose/pseuds/Violet_Rose
Summary: Zak and Aaron try to work out their issues - complete crack
Relationships: Zak Bagans & Aaron Goodwin
Kudos: 1





	Couples Counseling

Aaron grumbled at the ceiling. This was not exactly what he meant when he told Zak that they needed to work out their problems. So not what he meant. Zak shifted on the couch next to him, clearly as uncomfortable as he was. Nick and Billy suggested this psychologist through muffled snorts. That should have been their first clue.

“Mr. Goodwin, Mr. Bagans, you can come in now.” 

Slowly they followed her back into her office, sitting down in the two chairs opposite the giant wingbacked chair that the doctor sat down in. “So what brings you two in today?”

Zak cleared his throat. “Apparently we have problems.”

Aaron rolled his eyes. He wondered what would happen if he just stood up and walked out on this whole disaster.

“What type of problems are you having?”

Zak sighed, looking over at Aaron. “He thinks I’m a dick.”

“You are a dick.”

“At least you’re communicating your feelings,” she smiled.

“Look, doc,” started Aaron as he stood up. “This isn’t exactly what we need but thanks for your time and fitting us in.”

“Mr. Goodwin, please sit down and give me a chance. If you don’t feel like this is what you need after today then you don’t have to schedule another appointment.”

“Yeah, Aaron, sit,” Zak commanded with a sneer. “You’re the one that wanted to sort out our problems.”

So he sat.

“How long have you two been together?”

“We’re not together,” they both answered quickly. “At least, not like that,” Aaron answered quickly. “We’ve known each other for… eleven years?” he said, looking at Zak for confirmation.

“Yeah that sounds right.”

“So you’ve been through a lot together.”

“To hell and back,” Zak said, looking down at the floor.

“What problems do you need to work out?”

“Zak yells at me a lot… he’s degrading, humiliating, constantly telling me everything I’m doing wrong…” Aaron started.

“What sorts of things does he say?”

Zak rolled his eyes again. “Look doc, we don’t need couples counseling ok? We can work this out on our own. Come on, Aaron.”

“He does stuff like this. Telling me to sit. Go here. Do that. Stop doing that. Gawd Aaron that’s so annoying.”

“Well some of the shit you do is annoying!” Zak retorted.

“Zak’s a princess.” Aaron smiled smugly at the look he received from the younger man.

“Am not.”

“Dude, you’re totally a princess. You expect to be treated like royalty so you act like a dick. I’m a person too.”

Zak sighed. “I know. I don’t mean to be a dick. I don’t know why I say the things I do, but damn Aaron.”

The psychologist smiled. “It looks like we’re getting somewhere.” Zak just gave her a dirty look.

Aaron sighed. “I love you like a brother, dude, but I’m tired of being treated like shit.”

Zak shrugged. “I’m sorry, man. I don’t mean to treat you like shit, but sometimes you need that extra push to do what it is I need you to do.”

“How about just asking, bro?”

“I tried that. You’d whine like a little bitch.”

The psychologist crossed her legs and watched the two interact, making notes on her steno pad.

“Because some of the shit you want me to do is stupid and dangerous!” Aaron retorted, throwing his hands up in the air.

“But it gets results! And you’re like the best at getting the spirits to react to you without provoking! Plus,” Zak said smugly, “I think you secretly like it when I yell at you.”

Aaron rolled his eyes. “If I liked it we wouldn’t be here.”

“Whatever. The show is doing well and I think you have more fans than Nick and I combined.”

The psychologist’s eyebrows raised. “So are you jealous of his fan base?”

“What!?” Zak screeched. “No, not at all. Why would I be jealous of that?”

The psychologist shrugged. “You’re supposed to be the leader, correct? Does it feel wrong that Aaron would be the favored one and not you?”

“No, Aaron’s awesome and we’re a team.”

Aaron snorted next to him. “Team. Right. You and Nick make all the decisions and then put me in awful spots. Prison showers, dude. Prison showers.”

“Whatever, we put Nick in the morgue and he got trapped. That coulda been you, dude.”

“I’m hearing that Aaron just wants more respect,” she interjected.

“Exactly! Respect!”

“I respect you. Why wouldn’t I respect you?”

Aaron rolled his eyes again. “I don’t know, bro.” He sighed. 

Zak sighed back and crossed his arms as the psychologist continued to jot notes down on her pad. “What are you writing there? That I’m an asshole? I think that’s been established.”

“Mr. Bagans, I’m just making notes to myself about your conversation. I am not here to make judgments.”

“You are an asshole. I can make judgments,” Aaron smirked at him.

“Fuck you, bro.”

“Those are strong words, Mr. Bagans, please don’t use them in my office.”

Zak growled and pouted, slouching in his seat. “Sorry, Aaron,” he mumbled. “So what do you want?”

“I want respect. Treat me like a person and ask me instead of telling.”

“Fine,” he grumbled. “On the next lockdown, we’ll let you choose where you want to go.”

Aaron grinned. “Really?”

Sitting up straighter, Zak smoothed out his jeans. “Yeah, really. That’s fine. But you can’t go running and screaming, and you have to stay there for the good of the show, bro. It’s what investigating is all about. I know you can do it. You’ve done it before, but that’s why I’ve yelled at you. I feel like if I don’t you won’t stay put.”

Aaron shrugged. “I get scared. Look at what we do, Zak. I got a divorce because of this shit. It has a huge impact on me.”

Zak nodded. “Yeah, I know. I’m sorry.”

The psychologist smiled, closing her stenopad. “Well I think this conversation has made progress.”

Aaron nodded. “I think I got what I wanted.”

“Good, can we leave now?” Zak said, standing up.

Walking out of the office, Aaron smacked Zak on the back. “You’re still an asshole.”

“And you’re still a whiny bitch. I just wanted to leave there. Hella uncomfortable dude.”

“Whatever, bro. I still get to choose where I get to go on the next lockdown.”

Zak waved him off. “If that makes you happy, bro. We just don’t want to lose you. I don’t mean to be a dick, but like I said, you get off on it.”

Aaron scoffed. “I think you get off on being a dick.”

Zak shrugged. “Maybe.”

“Well, maybe sometimes I do need a kick in the ass.”

They stopped beside their cars. Zak shoved his hand in his pocket, pulling out his car keys. “I saw on the next lockdown, we shove Nick somewhere awful.”

Aaron grinned. “I’m sure there’s an enclosed space somewhere that has his name on it.”

Zak snorted. “See you tomorrow, dude.”

**Author's Note:**

> *Work originally publish on DA Feb 24, 2013*  
> Imported from my ancient DA account in an effort to keep all my fiction together


End file.
